Friday, February 14, 2014

Hot Stuff Baby!!!

This week is a week of chaos for our little family every year. Anniversary, birthdays, all falls on this week. Most of you know that I was diagnosed with MS a little over a year ago. I have been to a handful of doctors and none of them can agree on exactly what is wrong. Some say I have MS and others say that they are not 100% for sure but that they know I have brain damage. It's been a fun fun fun year. One thing is for certain, I struggle with fatigue, cognitive problems, muscle impairments, stamina, and various other delightful things. I have been working with a therapist who is helping me to re-program how I get things accomplished. This is supposed to help me find ways to conserve energy for the things that are really important, and thus make my symptoms more manageable. So let me illustrate how well that is going......

I began my week by scheduling myself to work Saturday through Tuesday. Keep in mind, this is typically how much I work in a month. Wednesday comes about and I have appointments after appointments because I was a delusional loon-a-tic and couldn't do those appointments on Monday or Tuesday since I over scheduled myself. The week was already getting away from me when I made a mad dash to Target on Wednesday afternoon to buy Valentines for my sweet hubby and sweet babies. I typically go all out on V Day morning. Heart shaped pancakes, fun dinnerware, Valentine surprises, etc. Why should this year be any different? When I arrived at Target I was a bucket full of dysfunction. I made a quick dash through the card aisle and found two cute little cards that when you opened them a monkey danced and sang a song. Perfect!! The kids will love them. I then picked out a V day card for My Donald and an anniversary card (our anniversary is Feb 13th. No I wasn't knocked up....long story, different blog). Anyhoo, so I was making some serious progress. I made it home and stashed all of the Valentine goodies in the hall closet.

Thursday arrives and I go to get Donald's anniversary card out of the hall closet and realize that it did not make it home from Target. Plan B....I go to our small town pharmacy to get a replacement only to find they had one anniversary card that had probably been in the store since 1978 and it looked more like a death sympathy card than an anniversary card. Needless to say, my beloved did not receive a card. I spent the rest of the day with Madelyn at a concert her class attended. Picked up Aulton from school, came home and got ready for my anniversary date with Donald. Sitter arrived and off we went. Tired, I  WAS FREAKING TIRED, but nothing would stop me because this was a special night out with the love of my life. We go to dinner and to a concert. We head home at 10:00. Keep in mind, 10:00 might as well be 4 in the morning. I felt like I had been on an all night bender. Whew!! Almost home, I hear my husband yell....hear a boom.....and then smell the smell. He hit a skunk, and I am quite sure every bit of it's DNA was evenly distributed under the car. Arrive home, still holding our breath. I instructed Donald not to park in the garage because the odor would get into the house. It would all be gone by morning.

Make it to bed around midnight....dear God I am dying here!! Wake up at 5:45 to get my V-Day surprises set up. I open up one of the kid's monkey cards and I pay attention to the lyrics of the song ......"Hot stuff, I want some hot stuff baby tonight, ooh ooh"! I look at the monkey and on the front of the card he is dressed in a tuxedo, but inside the card he is in a pair of boxer shorts, cowboy boots and a smile. What....the....hell???? I looked again to make sure I wasn't in the middle of a horrible nightmare. Nope, still a half naked dancing monkey singing. I panic. I decide that the kids are still little and they will not get the inappropriateness of the card and will just be happy to see a dancing monkey. At this point, there is no time for cutesy little pancakes and such. Wake the kids and tell them to go find their Valentine surprises. They run into the dining room and start looking at their stuff, then they get to the cards. My husband comes walking in all groggy and hears the cards playing. He has a look of horror on his face. The kids are playing with their cards and laughing at the monkey. Sweet! I pulled this off and all is well. Then Aulton says "momma, why is this monkey wearing boxer shorts and why does he not have on any clothes. Momma this is so funny. I want to take this to show and tell the next time". Donald and I, in unison, yell NO! My husband sits at the table with his head down, giggling at his nutso wife. I get the kids ready for school and remembered the skunk incident from the night before. I said to Donald, "oh I hope that smell is gone". He looks at me and said "Honey it is so not gone. I went out to warm up the van and it is still smells." "Well, how bad is it", I ask. His reply, "Just get the kids to school fast and everything should be fine." There we are, loading into a van that now smells like a barbecued skunk because of the heater blowing full blast. I wonder how long their teachers searched for the rabid skunk that was loose in the school until they realized "Oh hey, nobody's just the Childers kids."

How did I miss this?? How???

As you can see, my therapy is really helping. My proactive planning has completely transformed my ability to make energy conserving choices and my symptoms have completely went into remission. I dread Easter.......

Thursday, December 5, 2013

A Different Kind of Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving was celebrated totally different this year. Since my dad died two years ago, holidays have been a bit odd. My little family and I are learning new traditions and how we want to do our holidays going forward. Donald and I decided to take the kids out of town on a mini vacation this year for Thanksgiving. I felt a little guilty because I have never *gasp* spent Thanksgiving in a restaurant! Wasn't even sure it was entirely legal. But hey, you only live once so why not. We packed and set off for the Ozarks. First stop Eureka Springs and the Grand Tavern Restaurant.

While coming through the door of the restaurant, I did happen to notice a few "looks" from people. I totally knew they were cussing us under their breath for bringing two little bits into this fancy establishment. Come on's "Arkansas Fancy"'s not really Fancy Fancy. Get over it. Not going to lie, there was a little part of me that was praying they did not wipe their boogers on the table clothes, or see which one could fart loudest inside the wine glasses. They did great. On our leaving, we got a lot of compliments on how well our children behaved. Well, yeah. They are only the best kids on this planet!


After our feast, and I must say I am SOLD on going out to eat on Thanksgiving, (Go ahead, judge me. Try it one time and you will totally be sailing my sin ship with me!) we headed to Branson to our cabin and a weekend of shopping, Silver Dollar City, and games. 

I am totally against Black Friday shopping. To me it is like greed on speed. I just do not understand why people are drawn to this crazy day of the year. will be the same price for a week after BF. And, you won't have to act like a three year old crack addict in order to get the purple snuggie you HAVE to have. I say all of that to say that my beloved tricked me into going into a store on BF. So now, I have to admit that I have been into a retail shop on BF. My character has taken a beating!!! I still love him though; he gave me awesome kids. And he takes very good care of me. I shall keep him around. 

Above is a picture of our cabin we stayed in. It is quaint and lovely isn't it? This is the same picture that was posted online when we reserved the cabin. It was PERFECT! Secluded, rustic, warm and cozy. What they didn't show us online was that if you turn around the opposite direction of this cabin you will see this......

Yep, we stayed in a trailer park. Sigh....

Trailer park and all, we had a fabulous time! We are planning our trip next year. Maybe a large city. Chicago? New York? Who knows. I do know this is the beginning of a tradition. 

Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Summer Recap...Oh how I have failed the Blog World!

Needless to say I am sucking at this blog thing. See, I am back in school completing my BSN. This whole BSN thing is really wreaking havoc on my blogging, living, appetite and alcohol consumption (kidding....maybe), and everything that falls in between. I am ready to get this behind me and move on with life. Blah!

With that said, I shall do a recap of our summer. This is imperative because these days I can not even remember last week. So keep in mind, this is how I THINK our summer went.....

The past two summers have been very atypical as to how our family normally rolls. I work a lot during the summers and we have two nephews that come into our home for the summer months. This year, Jake was our Manny and watched after Madelyn and Aulton while Donald and I worked. I used to change Jake's diapers (a very long time ago), and I remind him of that fact all of the time. He was really my first child now that I think about it.

Jake with us in Colorado this summer

Our other nephew, Jared, has been coming to our house for the past two summers to work with my husband. He has become our child as well. We love having him at our house and have tried to convince  him to move in with us on a permanent basis....but for some reason he declines (hhmmmmm...). We had the pleasure of visits from his girlfriend Megan throughout the summer, and I must say, he has outdone himself. 

Sorry Jared, I had to steal this from FB. Which reminds me, why have you not supplied me with a picture? I feed you and love you and yet I get no picture. 

Donald and I have decided that we never want the Nephs to stop coming to our house every summer. We have yet to come up with a plan regarding convincing their wives-yet-to-be the importance of this living arrangement. Still in the works.

Donald, myself, Jake, Aulton and Madelyn went to Colorado this summer (Jared had to stay home and be a grown-up and work. Not fair!!). We were brave/crazy and took a road trip from Oklahoma to Colorado with two kids under the age of 6 and a nutty teenage boy. What were we thinking?! Actually, it turned out great and we want to go again soon. Our route went through Estes Park, then to Winter Park, to Aspen, then to Breckenridge and home.

Throughout the trip we made some serious mental notes, observations, and opinions:

1) Aspen is beautiful but entirely too snooty for our taste
2) Next time, we need a Suburban, Short Bus, or personal train to make our voyage more comfy
3)There are NO dinosaur tracks in Western Oklahoma....and I don't care how long you look for them in    120 degree!
4) One must check the locks on the balcony door before everyone else goes to bed. Failure to do so will  result in a long, cold night on the balcony (Jake!)
5) Who would live in the panhandle of Oklahoma? 
6) Do not have the attitude of "oh we will find a hotel somewhere between western Kansas and need to make a reservation in advance" when the whole southern part of Colorado is on fire with thousands of evacuees.  

Sweet baby Madelyn turned 4. I said "4"....nuts. I can not believe she is 4. It is unreal. I cried. I am still crying. For a fleeting moment I thought "we must have another baby". Then I thought about how much I love my sleep and my sanity and I got over it within 30 minutes or so. Whew...that was a close one! Thank God I cannot ovulate that quickly or I would have found myself in quite a predicament. Kidding, of course :/

So I asked Madelyn what kind of birthday she wanted. She informed me that she wanted a Power Ranger Rapunzel birthday. So like any nutso momma and daddy would do....that is exactly what we had.

Both kiddos started school a few weeks ago. Madelyn is still at the same school, and Aulton started a new school (Madelyn will join him next year). So far everything has gone really well. Aulton is getting ready to start Cub Scouts and Madelyn is wanting to do Tap/Jazz. Let the fun, and overwhelming schedule, begin!

Thursday, May 23, 2013

Tragedies and Milestones

It has been a whirlwind of activities this past week. The last week of school brought with it storms, school parties and kindergarten graduation. It was a week of tears; happy and sad. On Monday we cried for our neighbors in Moore, OK.....and we continue to cry and pray. Lives were lost, destroyed, uprooted and turned upside down when a F-5 tornado plowed through their lives. It saddens me to the core. I have lived in a few different places in the US, and traveled to far more places. No matter where I have been, people always say "Oklahoma people are SO NICE, they are just good people." I always knew this to be true, and this week just proves it even more. Okies, well, we just take care of each other. We have been through some bad times. Bombings, tornados, floods.....but we always come out of it stronger than before. In the past I always wanted to get out of Oklahoma and move to somewhere more exciting. I think I will hang around for a bit longer.

Aulton hit a major milestone this week. He is officially a first grader! He is so excited. He had a speaking part in the graduation ceremony and he nailed it! On the way home he was so excited to get home and go through all of his things that he was given at graduation. He was most excited about opening his rolled up diploma with the pretty yellow ribbon wrapped around it. He rushed in the house, threw all of his stuff on the floor and hurriedly unrolled his 'diploma'. He made the saddest face and said "momma, it is a blank piece of paper." I explained that they did that so that the real diploma would not get messed up and then I showed him his real diploma in the envelope. He looked at me, still hacked off, and said "momma, when I graduate from college there better be something written on my rolled up diploma!"

Madelyn is officially a pre-K'er!!! She had a an end of school party with her friends. On the way home from school she did a fist pump down to her side and said "oh yeah, made it to Mrs. Dills' class"! She has big plans for her upcoming pre-k year. She honestly believes that she will get to wear her princess dresses to school every day. I read a paper that was sent home and it read "pre-3 stats". On it, it listed her favorite color was purple, favorite food was pizza, favorite thing about school was everything, and the big question of what do you want to be when you grow up......Rapunzel!

We are just a bit crazy about Rapunzel

Friday, May 10, 2013

Mother's Day at Rejoice Schools

My sweet babies had wonderful Mother's Day events at their school. Their teachers did such an awesome job. It brought tears to my eyes.

Madelyn on the cover of a cookbook. Adorable! Thank you Mrs. King!

Aulton's handmade Mother's Day card. The sweetest!

I know that having children is not for everyone, but I sure am glad it was for me! 

Wednesday, May 8, 2013

Congrats Nursing Students....You Just Bathed a Dead Man

Oh nursing school. If you can survive it, I am convinced you can survive anything. It is not that it is all that hard.....they just make it hard. They fill it full of useless chaos, along with the already rigorous curriculum. Since it is Nurse's Week, I wanted to tip my hat to all of those poor souls who are in the midst of dealing with the chaos known as Nursing School......

It was our first day of clinicals. Up to that point we had only attended our theory classes and conducted bathing and basic need "clinicals" on dummies in our lab at school. To say we were GREEEN was an understatement. We knew how to bathe a patient and how not to kill them. Scary.

Six of us showed up to clinicals at our assigned hospital. We were starched, clean and organized....and completely utterly terrified. Our instructor divided us into two groups of three. The actual staff nurses had already completed their shift report prior to us arriving; therefore our instructor gave us a brief rundown of our patient and what needed to be completed. Bath and bedding hard could it be. My patient was less than pleasant. She did not want to be there and made mention of it more than once while I was trying to convince her the importance of cleansing her nether-regions and changing her bedding in the best Florence Nightingale attitude I could muster. My two sidekicks were right there with me. Each giving the look of "lets just get through this, survive, and check it off our list". We finished and left the room. The other group had completed their patient as well. They were at the nurse's desk waiting to be checked off by our instructor. The instructor was tied up so the charge nurse offered to go in and check things over. She went into the other patient's room naturally all 6 of us filed in there as well (eager to learn I tell ya!). There all 7 us stood around the patient's bed staring at this extremely old man. The nurse just casually said "oh, bless his heart, he finally passed". Mind you, we were green but all of us knew what "passed" meant. All of us...speechless with are eyeballs about to come out of our heads,  I was able to muster up a squeaky "um, excuse me?" The nurse, still very calm, said "oh we have been expecting him to pass for two weeks now. See he was here for palliative care. I am just so happy he is no longer suffering." Three students made a dash for the door, two of us stood there not knowing what to do or say, and I this day...the other one peed her pants. Not 100%, but pretty darn sure (thank God for those white nursing pants!) All I wanted to do was make a beeline to my crotchedy hateful woman and give her a big hug for not dying on me.

So we gathered in the hallway totally convinced that we would be immediately thrown out of the program and charges would be filed for killing our first patient while giving him a bath. Our instructor became aware of the chaos, crying, and peeing of pants and rushed to find out what happened. The staff nurse was finally clued in that the 3 students felt it was their fault the man had died. So there stood the nurse and our instructor trying to calm us all down and explain that it was nothing we had done. By the end of the day "we could all laugh about the situation"....(I still think a few are in therapy), and we all  graduated two years later. Looking back I think the little old man made a deal with God. I would imagine he was telling God to hold on for a few minutes because he wanted to scare the crap out of 6 nursing students.

Monday, May 6, 2013

Excuse me ma'am, are you aware of your GI Bleed?

With it being national nurse's week (thank you Hallmark), I feel compelled to share a nurse story. Nurses are a strange breed of people. Actually, we are just a group of educated, licensed, weirdos. We do weird things, like smell people. We smell our kids, spouse, animals, strangers, you name it....we smell it. There are a few things that if a nurse has been a nurse for any amount of time they will be able to lock onto instantaneously. Those things are C-diff, wound infections, and the big one GI BLEED. If you are a highly trained weirdo you can smell cancer. I am proud to be in that elite group so if you feel you are suffering a bout of cancer, give me a ring and I will come over and sniff ya.

Recently my beloved and our offspring took a road trip and I had to stop at Walgreens for some chapstick. While I was in the store I thought it to be a perfect opportunity to use the bathroom. As soon as I opened the door to the women's bathroom it hit me like a brick wall.....GI BLEED! So I make it to my stall all the while sniffing the air to see just HOW bad the GI bleed was. By the time I was in my stall I had determined that the lady next me may possibly be bleeding out. I did the look under the stall to see if feet were firmly planted with no sagging head between them, check....we were ok. Then I sat there thinking "I have to tell this woman she has a GI bleed. I wonder if she knows...surely she knows MY GOD a person in the next city would know". But then how do I tell this woman she has a GI bleed? I began rehearsing in my mind "um excuse me ma'am, I was sniffing the air and caught of whiff of your poo and as a nurse it is my obligation to inform you that you may very well meet Jesus tonight if you do not go to the ER immediately" ...that would terrify her. Then I thought perhaps I should just casually ask her if she had been experiencing any stomach discomfort. Um, awkward. As I sat on the toilet rehearsing, the woman washed her hands and exited the bathroom.  Oh dear God she is getting away!! I hurried and stormed out of the bathroom to find her. I paced Walgreens looking at about 10 different women. Great, which one was it? Should I just walk behind a couple of them and sniff? That may get me jail time, so scratch that idea. I know, I will go to the car and ask Donald what I should do. I made it to the car and told him the whole story and how it was imperative to get this woman help.....immediately. He looked at me like I had 10 heads, said God I love you and started down I-40. If you know of anyone who died of a massive GI bleed outside of a Walgreens....I am sorry. I tried.